If you are new to the blog, you might just be wondering what exactly I am writing about. It is the journey of my life as an adoptee, from birth to now....it is a journey of God's faithfulness and goodness as truth was brought to light. May I suggest that you go here to start from the beginning? It won't take that long to catch up. I promise. :)
If you have been following along, you may remember that I had come to the conclusion through DNA testing and doing research on Ancestry.com that a man named Elliott Martin was a possible candidate for my birth father. I wrote him a letter and turns out my research had actually been accurate. Because his wife was not exactly thrilled with my appearance and did not want the rest of the family knowing about me, I told him I would not reveal myself to any of them without his permission. The only possibility of anyone finding out about me was if the first cousin DNA match on 23andme who had been anonymous for the two years I had been on that site would somehow log on and find my profile.
Fast forward six months to August 13, 2016.....and that is exactly what happened. Steve, the kids and I had gone away for the weekend, when I got a message from that cousin, Keith Denton. He told me his mother was Susan Martin, who was Elliott's sister. I had been found. You can read all about the events leading up to that here.
It was dark in the hotel room and the kids were sleeping. I was frantically relaying to Steve what had just happened. I decided to respond to Keith, but did not divulge Elliott's secret since I had made a promise that I wouldn't. Instead, I wrote this:
"Hey Keith!!
Actually, I do know how we are related and we are first cousins. At the moment, I am not at liberty to explain how, but as soon I can, I promise I will let you know."
I was a bit excited. Who wouldn't be? Here was an opportunity to open the door to family that I wondered if I would ever get to know. I had made the promise to Elliott and intended to keep it. He was hoping his wife, Hazel, would come around and he would be able to tell his family himself. She had not moved in her stance at this point and I wondered if something might happen to him before I had a chance to meet any of the rest of the family. What then? I had a half-sister and half-brother that I knew about and frankly, I was curious. I wanted to get to know them and wondered what they might think about me. At the same time though, I knew that the poop was about to hit the fan. Since Elliott had told me of his recent conversation with Hazel about me, I knew there was no way this discovery by Keith was going to be a happy one for her. And I really wasn't sure how Elliott himself was going to feel about being exposed.
Hoping to give him a heads up about the situation and a chance to prepare for what was inevitably to come, I immediately messaged Elliott. It was 10:50 p.m.
"Hey Elliott! I just wanted to let you know that your nephew Keith Denton has just contacted me on 23andme which is the other DNA site that I had done testing through besides ancestry.com. He has showed up as my first cousin since the day I was on there. Only today he has messaged me to ask me how we are related. I told him that currently I am not at liberty to say how we are connected. I wanted to let you know, because I am sure he will begin pursuing finding out how."
I sent the message desperately praying he would see it before things escalated.
But they already had.
By the time I finished writing Elliott, Keith had already responded on 23andme.
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